Intimate thoughts...

There's this one point in your life that you know that you have already entered the world of wife-hood. This moment came to me when I realized that one of the first TV shows I watch when I wake up is Oprah. Haha its both funny and scary at the same time.

While I was waiting for Ferdie to meet me at City Hall train station, I killed time by browsing over some books in a store. I found myself ending up at the magazine section. For some time I've been thinking of buying my first O magazine. Shucks, I'm such an addict! Anyway, as the laziest magazine reader in the whole world, the first time I opened the fresh May 2005 5th year anniversary issue --- I simply looked at the pictures and the quotes with the big prints. I came across this quote from Christina Baldwin:

"When you're stuck in a spiral,
to change all aspects of the spin
you need only to change one thing"

This strucked me since I've been feeling so 'stuck'. I feel that I'm not really doing anything worthwhile with my time. I can do a lot here in Singapore but I refuse to be dictated by a schedule which makes my day simply a waste of time. I have engrossed myself in reading books, watching TV and going online that I have failed to do the things I have on my mind simply because I dont ever set a date to do all those things.

I have been searching for answers everywhere and I finally found it coming across this quote. Sa wakas! Reading this phrase gave me so much clarity. And the first thing that came to mind was my weight. I just have to change how I eat. Then I'm also thinking of getting my hair cut short again. Then finally enroll into a fencing class that I've been dying to do since College. And the list goes on and on.

Well, first things first... my weight. My weight is a problem because I feel that I'm going to get pregnant anytime soon but my body is not that healthy to accomodate a baby and that sucks! I am young but I am not really healthy and I feel so irresponsible for getting into this trouble. I am 23 but I feel I have the body of a 40 year old. I will have to commit myself to this. I should do this or I'll just be stuck again and see my life just pass by so fast without me...